I have a one year old! It amazes me how quickly time is flying by these days. It feels like yesterday I was at home, feeling my contractions getting stronger and stronger, wondering when I should call my husband home from work. He was in the last leg of his training with the fire department, about to graduate. Missing a day of training was a big deal. But having a baby was a bigger deal.

I will never forget that day. A pain unlike any other. I felt strong, determined, overwhelmed and excited. There are moments I wish I could forget and others I hope to remember forever. Our drive to the hospital, after the midwives told me it was only going to get more uncomfortable, and if we were doing this thing at the hospital, it was go time. It was rush hour and what was probably only a 10 minute drive, felt like an hour. I couldn’t sit still. Every contraction made it harder to breathe.

I remember finally saying, screw it – give me the drugs! I want all the drugs! At which point, my midwife told me that, honestly, by the time it kicked in, the baby would be out. I just had to “push through it”…literally.

I remember when the baby FINALLY arrived, and the midwife handed him over to me, my husband and I stared in awe of how amazingly beautiful he was. A minute or so went by before it even occurred to us that we hadn’t even looked to see whether it was a boy or a girl.

I remember going home later that night, completely exhausted yet full of adrenaline. I didn’t sleep a wink. My husband was passed out, and all I did was toss and turn, staring at the bassinet next to my bedside. I just wanted to hold our sweet little dude forever. So I scooped him up and took him downstairs to the spare bedroom, where I laid him next to me and watched as he slept soundly.

Between the sleepless nights, the hundreds of diapers, the tears, the cuddles, the laughs and all the ups and downs, it’s been the best year.

Last week, my main man Smith turned one year old. And I could not be happier to celebrate the crazy year it’s been. Here’s a glimpse into his first birthday party!

This is sweet Chloe, who we had yet to meet! My cousin’s adorable daughter was born in January in Washington, and this was her first trip home to Ottawa!

He wasn’t sure about his cake to start with, but then the icing hit his lips and it was go time.

I love you, Monkey!